My most comfortable, favorite of all favorites, most loved pair of shoe just gave up on me.
The heels are about to snap from walking thousands of miles to get to where I'm supposed to be. The straps are slowly losing its color and glow. The comfort that it once offered me is slowly vanishing into thin air.
And I sat there, staring at my shoes with tears clouding my vision, not knowing what to do.
I need a new pair of shoe. I can't keep wearing my old shoe just because I love it. I can't insist on wearing it just because it fits and it compliments me in every way possible. I just can't keep using it because if I do, sooner or later, my feet'll hurt.
Maybe it’s indeed time to find a new pair of shoe. But will I ever be able to find the exact kind? The exact fit?
There's something about those shoes that found a place in my heart, making it hard to let go. I was so used to being with it all the time, regardless of the place, regardless of the outfit. Screw color coordination, what matters is I'm wearing those shoes. It's that kind of bond that's simply hard to detach from. The way they fit to a T, making it seem like they were made only for me. The comfort it gives me, a feeling so light I'd think I was walking on clouds.
They say all good things do have their limitations. Perhaps, my shoes have just reached theirs. So we go on shoe shopping, in search of the perfect shoe that can replace or will come close to that of my fave. I try on all sorts of shoes, all colors and all styles. I try my very best not to compare and instead to look on the qualities that they possess which my shoes do not. I give each one of them a try in hopes of finding the right one. I need something I can use on a daily basis; Something that won't let me down and won't break on me no matter what I do, no matter where I go; Something that'll remain strong and sturdy despite how rough the road may be.
And then I realize that no matter how I keep on looking for a new pair of shoe, I will always come back to my fave. No matter how hard I try and how I convince myself that there are others better, I can't fool myself. I guess my heart will always be with the one that gave up on me. And I'm furious at myself for that.
Maybe with just the right touch and if I can just have my old shoes fixed, things will be ok. A little change here and there, replacements for torn parts and a whole lot of polish and it might be as good as new. Sure I can try, but there's no guarantee that it will be as strong and as sturdy as it once was. There's no assurance that it will be as good as new and that you can just pick things right where you left off.
So the battle now is within myself. Do I stay with my old shoes even though my feet'll hurt, in hopes that someday it'll get better? Or do I go wear other shoes but not get attached until the right one is found? -which mind you, requires a ton of patience, time and a whole lotta faith in this quest to find if the shoe does fit.
