Affected Much?

A friend of mine saw my old favorite shirt today. It was on someone else. (gasp) Sure, I've already given it up. Sure, I've already stopped fooling myself into thinking it can still fit me. Yes. I gave it up not because I don't like it anymore but because somehow, it outgrew me. Sad and yet oh so true.

It has been what? Months? Years? I've come from denial to finally accepting that that shirt was only meant to be with me for that certain amount of time. It has seen me on my worst and it has been with me on my best. There were even times when I don't think of it at all. So there shouldn't really be any feeling of bitterness. In fact, there shouldn't really be any emotions left anymore. But as I heard the news, I couldnt deny the fact that a part of me was somehow affected...deeply affected. Why is that?

I'm not holding on anymore. I've let go of all hopes, even the tiniest flicker. I've learned to forget and most importantly, I've learned to move past that. But this unexpected news caught me off guard and definitely threw me off my feet. I was bothered. I was disturbed. For a minute there, all current problems of the heart seemed to have vanished and in its place is this feeling of confusion. And yet no matter how I try to think past this, I can't and I have no idea why.

This will pass. Perhaps. I will get over this. Perhaps. I just need to get used to the idea. Perhaps. But for now, I am disturbed. That's for sure.

Affected much?(think)